Thursday, 10 February 2011

2 weeks to go - dealing with fear.

This week so far I have run a grand total of 19 miles. Today I am not running at all, which feels most strange. However my body really needed the rest. My legs are beginning to feel a lot better, all the niggles and sore bits are slowly disappearing, although I still have no speed.

It is 2 weeks today until I start my 225 mile run across Wales. I suspect it will be a little more than 225 miles as I planned the route online, and cut a few corners whilst plotting it. I have spent the extra time I have had this week getting as much sorted for the week away as I can. I have been in contact with all my overnight stops and checked that they are all ok. A good job I did too as the hotel in Llandeilo was booked for the wrong night! I have also ordered some hoodies for the support crew and myself which Manhattan Marketing, Llanelli very kindly gave me at cost price.

I don't feel too nervous yet. I tend not to feel nervous about big events until very close to the day. I am pretty good at filing away difficult thoughts until I need them. Possibly not a very healthy way of dealing with fear but it works for me. I'll need the terror and the adrenaline during the week, I don't need it now, so I'm tucking it away in a dark corner to bring out later. I think the quote below says it all:

"Bravery is not the absence of fear, it's the ability to operate in spite of it."

I don't know who said it, but feeling the fear and doing it anyway is the way to go. The emotional highs and lows of ultra events are utterly addictive. You have to find reserves that you never knew you had. Facing the unknown and coming through triumphant - what a kick!

There is still so much to do. I need to make sure my support crew have the same route as me, and that we all have hard copies we can carry with us - no good having the route online! I have also yet to finalise a sports masseur for the last 4 days as Wayne will need to go back to work on the Monday. I have someone in mind, but need to sort out the final arrangements - the thought of being without a massage is a bit scary!

Last week everyone I met suggested I was mad ...... I don't feel mad! Running a country just seemed the logical next step after 3 marathons in 3 days. As crazy as that sounds, when you know you can run 80 miles in 3 days and survive, you want to know if you can run 225 in 7 and live to tell the tale. Only a few more days and I get to find out!

I will be blogging throughout my journey across Wales, so keep on reading, and enjoy the emotional rollercoaster with me!

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